Here’s Why We Get Too Attached To People

Otherwise known as the overemotional, the clingers, the givers, the ones who just care too much… and so on. These “titles” all have so many different meanings and I want to clear up what it is like to be someone who gets extremely connected with other human beings.

We crave relationships with others. We love to cultivate and grow relationships with people and there is no better feeling than recognizing when someone has crossed over into that small group of people you would do anything for.

We love with an intensity that little can handle in relationships. We give so much that sometimes we disappear into that person, unable to recognize who we are without them. We literally give a piece of us to them and trust them to take care of you like you are undoubtedly going to do for them. We love so fiercely that we forget to love ourselves and more often than not, we end up hurting because of that.

We feel each emotion deeper and stronger than the average person not because we are overemotional, but because we feel we have connected with someone so strongly that our happiness explodes brighter and our sorrow sinks deeper through the ups and downs of life. All of our emotions stem from interactions with other people, either lack of or an overabundance of it, we feel because of how others interact around us.

We love deep friendships.To get to know someone and find out every single thing about them is to feel like you have truly understood another complex being. When we recognize those who give to us, we give back. Sometimes, we give back so much that others stop giving all together until the work load sits on our shoulders and slowly weighs us down.

We want to belong.

We want to belong.

But see, people who are too attached to others can’t feel that weight when they are focused on someone they love. They don’t care the pounds they carry as long as they are doing everything possible to cultivate and help a relationship with another friend. We love genuineness and feeling like we have purpose or belong somewhere.

This is why we are told we care too much. We’re too nice. Someone can stab you in the back, crush your heart, exploit your secrets and a piece of you will always want to help them and be there for them. No matter how badly your broken and bleeding. It’s hard for us to step back and recognize when we need to protect ourselves.

It’s taken advantage of far too much. 

We can stand up for ourselves unless its to the people we love. We can be the toughest, strongest person you know but if we love you- it’s hard for us to not become putty in warm hands.

So please, for me, understand how you should be treating a person who feels so deeply and gives so much to others. 

Be patient in understanding that sometimes those emotions we have can grip our hearts without reason. Choose to be present and just listen to what they have to say. Sometimes we just need to explode even if it’s nonsense we won’t care about in ten minutes.

Be gentle. We can be overwhelming at times by how much we feel and how deeply we connect with others but that doesn’t mean you have to match it. It just means you have to try and understand that.We love and interact with friends in different ways. Believe me, we’re an understanding bunch.

Give back. This doesn’t mean you have to constantly be going overboard. Just remember that love given to someone should not be taken for granted. Every day you should think of how you appreciate another person and why you want them in your life. If you can’t come up with any reasons… what are you doing?

We find the other good eggs out there eventually.

Until Next Time,

Anna Marie

4 thoughts on “Here’s Why We Get Too Attached To People

  1. ahomm759 says:

    Wow….. You have just explained who I am in this post! I was not sure that was possible, but everything you just said describes me. I’ve always been called “too nice” or been told I “cared too much”, like it was akin to something wrong with me! Thank you for bringing this to light. You truley have a gift for the written word!! Love you girl, hope you are doing well

    Liked by 1 person

    • Anna Marie says:

      Thank you so much. I’m so glad my words have that affect on you. I’m also glad to find another girl out there who struggles with this part of ourselves. Love you too, hope you’re doing amazing 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Sanchari says:

    When someone doesn’t give back, it’s way too hard to accept that though, when we finally realize it. Because there’s that prickly feeling that you’ve invested so much in a friendship/relationship, but got back less.

    Liked by 1 person

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