I Vow, 2017.

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I vow to worry less about others love for me and work harder to give that love to myself.

I vow to breathe through anxiety and put myself first.

I vow to say no without an explanation and feel comfortable doing so.

I vow to love fiercely in every way possible.

I vow to be vulnerable and real.

I vow to not let the fear of judgement control who I am.

I vow not to measure my success by the amount of likes on a picture or the amount of compliments in person.

I vow to keep some goals to myself and smash the hell out of them.

I vow to let go of could-bes and things that don’t work out.

I vow to truly take in the moments that make me carefree.

I vow to say what’s on my mind even if it isn’t what someone agrees with.

I vow to minimize the “stuff” I purchase and save it for the experiences I can live.

I vow to be open and genuine.

I vow to never numb myself to joy for fear of feeling pain later on.

I vow to say sorry less, to stop apologizing for who I am.

I vow to keep feeling every single emotion fullly and showing the world how it should be done.

I vow to call myself beautiful and believe it.

I vow to work through rejection in an effort to better myself.

I vow to have more courage to tell someone how I feel only for the sake of them knowing.

I vow to always find hope in any incredible amount of darkness I face.

I vow to accept that which I cannot change and move forward in the direction I’ve been pushed and pulled.

I vow, for one year, to give every ounce of love to myself so that others know how it should be done.

I vow, for one year, to be exactly who I am in the most kind and genuine way possible. 

I vow, for one year, to put my happiness utterly and completely before anyone else’s. 

I will always keep pushing, keep striving and keep growing.

I will never give up.

Love,

Anna Marie

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What are you doing?

I’m going to tell you something.

In this moment, no one cares about what you’re doing.

No one cares if you’re reading a book or watching Netflix.

No one is wondering if you’re deciding to put on make up or going to curl your hair.

No one wants to know if you went on a 6 mile run or walked ten steps to the bathroom.

These moments, every moment, is about you.

I’m giving you the freedom to understand that you are allowed to be selfish.

I’m also telling you that it is completely up to you what you do.

If you choose to watch Netflix while munching on the nearest snack food for 8 straight hours, is that going to get you to your “dream life” that you ponder every so often?

Is skipping class going to give you satisfaction?

We tell our friends, family and strangers our plans, our goals and our dreams.

I want to lose weight, I want to read 20 books this next year, I want to put my phone down more often.

In the end though, we find ourselves stuck in this place that is stagnant and comfortable.

We are laying in bed thinking how much EASIER it would be to just not do anything.

It sure would, wouldn’t it?

That’s the difference between creating a life full of pushing boundaries  or staying where you are. 

The need to be able to push yourself and motivate yourself every single day.

The hunger for success whether it be to eat more vegetables or smile at strangers.

The satisfaction upon completing a goal you’ve been working at for months.

No one cares what you are doing right now.

But these days that you stay stuck will turn into weeks and those weeks into months and those months into years until you realize that this is your life. 

We have all thought about where we want to be in a few years but it doesn’t just magically happen.

We have to strive and push ourselves every single day for it.

We create our lives by doing things that make us happy.

So what are you going to do today that will make you happy? Not comfortable, but happy.

Until Next Time,

Anna Marie

282 Words About Office Drama

I work in a professional environment at a University and the drama and gossip I hear is outrageous. I hear half of my co-workers bashing co-workers and roommates talking about each other behind their back the second one of them leaves.

Honestly? It’s driving me insane. I am one of a few staff members who sits quietly and listens to all of this but after everything I’ve heard these past few months, I am about ready to scream. I have no idea how this behavior will work in the real world when we graduate college and must be adults in our careers. I love my job but some times the people make it quite disappointing.

I know the real world will have some of these offices too, but I will never choose to be a part of one. Quite frankly, I’m really sick of listening to people say one thing and act another.

So rising above it? Yes. I’ll keep my mouth shut, eyes wide in disbelief, and make mental notes that I would never befriend these people outside of a work environment.

I could confront them. Yet, is it really worth it? I make them mad, they don’t listen, they continue to talk. So I won’t say anything until they hurt a friend. I’ll talk with the workers I’ve gotten to be really close to and do my best to plug my ears to the words of those who must talk poorly about others.

It’s sad that in my college career, I sometimes feel like I’m back in high school.

If you have any glorious pointers for what I could do, please PLEASE comment below.

Until tomorrow,

Anna the Frustrated Student-Worker